The Journey

There is a Chinese proverb that states, "The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."

Welcome to my journey....the year of healing.

For as long as I can remember, my parents were the nucleus of my life.  At the age of 12, I spent summers working for my dad on the farm and in a sawmill. We had cattle and pigs and all of us would have to move and separate them periodically. In the summer, we put up hay for the coming winter months and in the winter we fed the hay to the cattle.  Also, in the summer, my dad would plant a huge garden which needed care and mom would can and preserve the vegetables.   I remember times when it was that food we grew and preserved that would sustain us.

All of the family worked in the sawmill year round as long as we had the logs to process.  It was just the four of us; Dad, Mom, my brother and me and we each had a job to do.

I tell you this because it was ingrained in me that we did what needed to be done for survival.  Even after I was grown and had a life of my own, Mom and Dad came first. Whatever they needed, I was there for them.

Don't misunderstand me.  I had a wonderful childhood. We worked hard, but there was alot of love, good times, and lots of memories. We were always there for each other.

In 2015, I moved to my current location to care for my father, whose health was declining.  During his last 6 months, I was his caregiver.  After he passed, I stayed here to watch over my mom.  It was during this time, that I invested in myself and began my own personal growth journey.

Still, Mom was the nucleus of my life. My schedule, my business meetings, any travel...all was centered around the needs of my mom.

In March of 2022, Mom fell and broke her hip. From that day on, I became her full time caregiver.  I set aside my business, conferences, travels, and hiking which I enjoyed immensely.  Mom needed me more and I was happy to set it aside for a season.

Her health declined over the following months and in November, she passed away. I grieved during the holidays and contemplated my life and how drastically it had changed with her passing. My life surrounded around my mom and now she was gone.

On January 1, 2023, the air was warm and very foggy. I decided to hike a trail as I find that nature is a healing force and I find a connection when I'm exploring.

I wasn't prepared for what would meet me on that day. It was an easy trail and only 1.5 miles. Awareness showed up as I soon discovered how much my own health had declined. It was an "aha" moment. My left knee, back, shoulders and neck burned with pain. It was excruciating and I had to stop often to rest. It took me a long time, but I was able to make it around the trail and back to the vehicle. I was almost in tears and shocked.  Before Mom broke her hip, I was walking trails between 3 - 5 miles long. Sometimes, I would go every day if time and weather allowed.  I often went off trail and explored the wooded areas and climbed amongst huge boulders along the rivers. Now, it was all I could do to walk a relatively short, easy trail.

I had a choice to make.  I could either sit down and continue to let my health decline. At least I would be mostly pain free.  Or, I could reclaim my health.

I decided to reclaim my health.

My theme for this year is, "The Year of Healing"

I am going to document this journey.  Every painful step. And there has been pain. Immense pain.  But I also realize that I'm going to have to work through the pain in order to regain my health.

But it's not just about the physical healing.  I have some healing to do emotionally.  Caregiving is not an easy job. It's very rewarding and I wouldn't trade the time I had with my dad and then my mom for anything. But it is also a journey of emotions. Good emotions that can take you to greater heights and hard emotions that drag you to the lowest depths. Those emotions do not go away. 

This is what this blog will be about.  My journey of healing.

So, grab a cup of coffee, or the drink of your choice and join me as I share my journey, and lessons I learn along the way.

It's time to reclaim my life.

Welcome.

Until next time, be well.

Karen